Morning Yoga Day 3

5:30 is really early, Wednesday morning- I actually got up and did Yoga- I also did it the night before since I didn’t get up Tuesday morning until it was time to get ready for work.

For those of you who don’t know me well, I am a morning person, but 5:30 is early to start bending and stretching. I notice how big my stomach has gotten when it gets in the way of touching my toes, it is like a pillow has been placed on my lap and then I try to lean over to tie my shoes, the pillow squeezes my lungs and it is hard to breathe.

After about 15 minutes of bending and lunging I am finally awake. Beads of perspiration start to form on my forehead and I realize that each time I watch this Yoga DVD it feels longer than the last time. Every time I think that it is about to be over, I have to get out of a stretching position and go back to downward dog- which is a position where your feet and hands touch the floor and your but is really high in the air- arms straight, legs straight, hamstrings taught to a near muscle snapping point.

Tonight I plan to go for another run. Hopefully I avoid falling on my face again in front of the world.

I have many mental pictures that have helped me to stay focused this time. One of them being the picture of a snooty principal that looked at me like I would never be anything more than a fat couch potato- it wasn’t my principal, but a principal I worked for at a school a long time ago- she looked down on me like I was nothing more than a house maid- yes, I was the janitor, but janitors are people too.

Then last week Albert’s little girl told me when I asked if I could jump on the pogo stick that her brother was pogo-ing on- She said- “No, your too fat!” She was so cute when she said it, but I still smacked her little face and said, “Shut up you skinny little Turd!!” Not really, but part of me wanted to.

Last night I ended up stress eating a large piece of homemade lasagna and 4 pieces of bread. I had already decided to eat a light dinner, but my neighbor asked me to take him to get his car. My neighbor is a crazed loon, but I acquiesced and took him to his car- he brought the wrong keys- who does that? Who grabs the wrong keys when they are asking a favor of someone else? As we were coming back to get the right keys I get pulled over by a cop. Ugh. The cop said it was for a missing tail light, but in truth I think it was because I was in my old truck wearing a bandana on my head with the windows down and a shady character in my passenger seat. That whole ordeal took about 10 minutes, but it felt like an ETERNITY. My stupid neighbor kept laughing and I said, “I really don’t think this is funny.” I was torn because I felt like I was with a special Ed person, but at the same time I knew that he wasn’t so I wanted to punch him in the face for being so stupid. He kept asking me questions like, “You don’t have any warrants do you?”

When being stopped the black part of me always thinks that I am going to get “Rodney Kinged” The white part of me thinks that I am going to get off with a warning and the Native American part of me thinks that the officer is going to take my car away, my apartment, give me a blanket full of malaria and stick me on a reservation.

All of that stress built up to an unbelievable hunger and I actually did better than I normally would have- but I still wasn’t as good as I had planned.

Say a prayer for me. Being 340 and trying to run is always hard on the body, my feet hurt, and my back has still been hurting, but pain is part of life isn’t it?