Fragrance – The Human Collection

Inspired by Feelings - Created by God, toyed with by the Devil...

Beauty – Sometimes the scent of Beauty comes naturally, but for others it is extremely expensive and some people will spare no costs to acquire it. Most people don’t realize that this fragrance is best when consumed internally and allowed to emanate from the inside out.

Inferiority – this fragrance can be worn by anyone that feels that they just don’t quite measure up to society’s standards. For some reason it motivates people to avert their eyes, fidget, and avoid social gatherings.

Arrogance – most people mistake this fragrance for the very similar fragrance called Confidence. Arrogance, however, is an overpowering fragrance that comes on strong and belittles every other fragrance around it. It’s overpowering aroma is very off-putting and for some reason the wearers of arrogance seem to always apply it liberally.

Tramp – this fragrance is cloying and overly sweet. It is very inexpensive and worn a lot of times mixed with inferiority, or DGAC. This fragrance is surprisingly popular these days.

Perv - A loud, offensive fragrance it almost calls out to all those around it. Worn mostly by men it seems to inspire them to seek out wearers of tramp. This particular fragrance comes with a list of cat calls such as "Shake that monkey!" and "Hey Baby, show me what your workin' with!".

DGAC – This fragrance also called “Don’t give a crap” is a fragrance worn by many people that have tried many other fragrances and finally decided that this fragrance fit’s them best. They don’t take care of themselves and they don’t care what other people think. It is also labeled under, I quit, I give up, and L.O.S.E.R.

Frigid B – This fragrance is worn exclusively by women who want to keep men at a distance. It says many different things about the person, some of them are, but are not limited to: Keep your distance, Back up out my face, I am a very focused career minded woman who doesn’t have time for you or anyone else, and I have been hurt in the past and I am not going to get hurt again.

Insecurity – This is a very popular fragrance. It seems that everyone wears this fragrance every now and then, some more than others. Its overall bouquet seems to change depending upon the wearer.

Desperation – A unisex fragrance worn mostly by singles. This is an overly eager fragrance that seems to repel the opposite sex like OFF repels mosquitoes. For some reason the wearers of Desperation don’t even realize that they are wearing it, or that they accidentally spilled the entire bottle on themselves.

Oblivious – Worn by people who have no idea what is going on around them. While wearing oblivious a person often times will tell racist or off-color jokes completely ignorant of the fact that they are offensive. Oblivious smells like manure, however, the wearer seems to have no sense of smell.

Imitation – this fragrance is also labeled as Eu de Fake and Phony. The problem with this fragrance is that it doesn’t last long, and anyone who uses it eventually ends up smelling sour. Imitation is an almost magical fragrance that allows you to choose what it is going to smell like when it is first put on, but eventually your own natural stench consumes the Imitation and everyone can smell you for what you really are.

Real – this fragrance is rare, but when found it is always a favorite. Sincerity, honesty, and integrity are some qualities of Real. The wearers of Real are normally very popular, fun-loving, and jovial. They are rarely smell of Insecurity, or Inferiority. Often times they will wear Confidence or Beauty, but the underlying aroma of Real is always there.

This post was inspired by a late night run. I said "hi" to another runner and he barely said "hi" back. His fragrance of inferiority swarmed around him like a cloud of gnats.

Tell me about the fragrances you have noticed wafting about in your office, where you shop, at your church.