Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Boot Camp

Perhaps I didn't mention it, but during my holiday feasts I consumed more calories 3 sumo wrestlers at an all-you-can-eat sushi buffet. When I jogged on the treadmill after a weeks worth of partying I started to smell something sweet. I touched my forehead and it was sticky. I looked at my arms and they were covered with what looked like donut glaze - I was literally sweating sugar!

Like the rest of America, I plan to diet in the New Year, but for now I plan to enjoy the holidays denying myself nothing and consuming every tasty confection that is prepared for me.

However, in Kentucky, Joe Bruner has found a gym and that gym has cardio classes and today he suggested we do a Boot Camp class. "I ain't afraid of no boot camp!" I told him, knowing that in the past I had destroyed many a boot camp class and went home ready to sign up for the Army. Amber, Nicole, Joe and I started the class and one of the girls informed us that it would be from 9-10:30. I started to worry. 90 minutes of hard cardio is A-LOT. Especially if in the last month you have replaced your cardio workouts with Christmas parties and binge eating.

The class started with the dreaded jump rope. It was the longest 3 minutes of my life. We went from jump rope to 50 jumping jacks WITH WEIGHTS, 50 toe touches kicking out with one foot while touching with the opposite arm, and then 50 mountain climbers!!! We did it and then the instructor said RINSE AND REPEAT!!! So we did it again. After about 15 minutes of class I knew that I had already burned about 3000 calories - at this rate I knew I would be back down to my pre-holiday weight by the time the class was over.

My favorite part of the class was moving to the basketball court where we ran suicides and each time we came to the base line we did 10 push-ups. I didn't realize that you could actually expel your interior gastrointestinal system, but I almost did - twice.

When the 90 minutes was over I prayed to God and asked him why he allowed Satan to work as a boot camp instructor in Kentucky - I am still awaiting his answer.

So, that being said, Kentucky has been fun, and when I return home I am probably going to be ripped and there will be no need for New Years Resolutions!

Miss you guys and gals!

14 Comments:

Fred said...

My version of boot camp is a 90-minute nap. Remind me not to visit Kentucky anytime soon.

2:27 PM  
Logan Bennett said...

Yo, Dude that sounds worse then a day of football practice, man remind me never to try that one out.

Wow I bet that will learn ya huh??

3:32 PM  
Lee Ann said...

Sounds like you have been enjoying the holidays.
I think I am going to join the gym starting in January, I am actually looking forward to it.

5:24 PM  
Live, Love, Laugh said...

WOW! You are hilarious Eddo!!

9:52 PM  
Leann said...

Can't wait to see the new buff Eddo!

10:26 PM  
MsThang said...

As you know I have been to the real thing (hehe) all I have to say to that is try royally pi**ing off your drill sargeant (RDC for the Navy).. life sure doesn't get pretty for atleast 2 hours, and that is assuming someone hasn't done something else to warrant more punishment! Boy am I glad those days are over!

With that being said the only exercise I truly despise to this day is mountain climbers!! yuck!

11:25 PM  
MsThang said...

Oh and you would think they would have more classes like that here considering we are on a military base lol..

11:26 PM  
Amstaff Mom said...

Wow. I got tired just reading that. Remind me never to say "yes" to any exercise classes Joe recommends. Geesh!

Try to remember, YOU'RE ON VACATION!

4:52 AM  
Shenna said...

My question is, how do you feel today?

5:03 AM  
Saur?Kraut said...

When the 90 minutes was over I prayed to God and asked him why he allowed Satan to work as a boot camp instructor in Kentucky.

*LOL*

Lots of luck. I am at continual war with myself: is that extra helping really worth my busting my butt to get it off? Sometimes the answer is no, but I do it anyway... *sigh*

5:43 AM  
Biggy said...

I hope none of the other ManiAACs read this! :)

8:29 AM  
Three Score and Ten or more said...

I think you owe us before and after pictures. (after what? I won't say.)

10:26 AM  
Badoozie said...

soooooo, exactly what happens if you don't perform these "activites" as instructed. does satan burn you on the forehead? does he beat you with a fork?

i'm with fred on this one

my idea of boot camp is bloggin with a huge giardhelli chocolate bar filled with creamy caramel, and an ice cold water, while i do 20 sets of finger repetitions, resulting in posting and comments

11:52 AM  
Edgy Mama said...

E-spouse and my bro-in-law did something similar last year on vacation. Neither of them could walk for close to three days afterwards!

Hope you recover more quickly than they did!

2:31 PM  

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