My Trainer...The White Russian

I know what you are thinking, Dolph Lundgren Rocky IV- but no, he isn’t that big. He weighs only about 178, but pound for pound he is stronger than me and has more endurance.

This week we have been doing arms,back, biceps, triceps, delts, traps, and tonight we better be doing legs- I am gifted in the leg department - (thank you God!) .

The thing about working out with someone is A) You don’t want to look like a wimp B) You can’t give up and go home when you are tired C) You have someone there to push you and help you make it through those last few crucial reps. D) Working out alone is boring.

Maksim Mayavorich is The White Russian. Sometimes I want to kick him in the face. He’s always concerned about form and follow through, he has these new ways to lift things that I have never heard of, he is consistent and disciplined, he wants to work out 4 days a week!!

I HATE HIM!!!

I am always going to hate Maksim, but I am going to love the way my arms and back and chest and legs look in a few months. And besides, I need someone to kick me in the pants, I need someone to push me to do better, I need someone yelling at me like a drill sergeant, pushing me to go the extra mile.

I look around the gym and we are actually quite lucky- very few people have someone to work out with- and trust me, there is nothing more depressing and lonely than working out by yourself.

So here’s to The White Russian- may your arms be as big as mine someday- ha!

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Travis "Green Eagle" Miller

Travis- how do I love thee?
Let me count the ways
1 for all the times that you made me laugh
2 for all the times you included me in your philosophical banter even when you knew I was too stupid to understand
3 for the good times we have had just chillin at your casa
4 for the times you read my website when I least expected it
5 because you are related to Cody
6 because you make me feel good about me...

Okay-is that sappy enough- of course Travis I enjoy seeing you on the weekends! Sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel left out- I will see you Saturday night-

Scrubs

The fastest way to lose something is to want it too much.

Every week I watch Scrubs and I laugh and laugh, and a invariably I cry. Each episode lately has had some little tid-bit that is so touching, so overwhelmingly wonderful, that I can’t help but wonder- why in the world did God make me so emotional!!!

Tonights episode Molly Shannon played an Ambulance driver and she drove Dr. Cox crazy with her incessant babble. Eventually he tries to ignore her by riding in the back of the ambulance and Molly Shannon crashes the ambulance and becomes Dr. Cox’s patient. He asks Molly, “What could have happened to you to make you so unable to cope with reality that you have to fill every waking moment with babble” and Molly replies, “Fine, don’t visit me, my son will come.” And then Dr. Cox realizes that her son is dead and he goes back and spends time with her and asks her how her son died. It was so sweet and so real and it makes you wonder why in the world God made us need so much. We need the people we love, and when they are not there we miss them, we miss them so much that life is unbearable and sometimes hardly worth living.

I quoted Zach Braff (JD) at the beginning of this post- “The fastest way to lose something is to want it too much.”

I applaud the writers of Scrubs, they continue to raise the bar for prime time television.

I Hate to Admit it but...

I am so Crazy in Love with Destiny's Child- I recorded their performance last night from the RMA's- I lost my breath...

Can you keep up? Baby Boy- make me lose my breath, make some noise...

33 Things to post about... And then some.

If you read Eternal Sunshine... I would like a spotless mind, then you might have wondered about my real father and why I was/am upset with/about him. I always get these email forwards from him that have 30 other people on the list and I kept thinking... "Why doesn't he ever send me a real email?" So finally I just broke down and wrote him a quick note and said, "Hey, these FWD:'s are great and all, but I would like a personal email every now and then..." And he replied that he wasn't sure if that was a valid email address for me, or if I ever checked that email address and that is why he didn't write. It could also be that he is just like me and he doesn't always make the best decisions when it comes to relationships and therefore when the crap hits the fan it is much easier to avoid it than to face it head on. Well, I am going to change that about me and hopefully about him as well. I don't expect us to be able to make up for 10 years of not speaking to each other, but we can at least be friends.

On another note- October is BIRTHDAY CRAZY INSANE MONTH for me. Cribby, Alan, my sister Dena, my sister Precious, Amanda Adams, and a couple other people that I can't remember right now were all born in October!!! There just isn't enough weekends for all those birthdays!!! ALL THESE BIRTHDAYS ARE BLOWING MY MIND!!!

Saturday night I was going to the wonderful Joe T. Garcia's for Amanda Adams' birthday party and my Cadillac broke down. I think I through a rod in it or something because one minute I am hurrying along and the next minute it sounds like the hamster will is grinding against the water bottle and the whole thing is about to explode. 2 hours, a wrecker, and 120 dollars later I am back at my apartment. Well, it was only 10:15 and the night was still young so I hopped in Old Faithful- My blue truck (the same one that my good friend Jes loves to borrow) and I drove to Denton to see Cody and Dumas and watch a recorded episode of Smallville that I missed.

I love seeing Cody and Dumas, and I had lunch with them earlier in the day over at Tin Star in Frisco- Delicious.

Back to Cody's...

So Dumas and I both stayed the night over at Cody's and the next morning Cody's mom Nita made us the best waffles and sausage- it was way too tasty.

We also played my new favorite game racquet ball- Cody and I played for an hour and I am LOVING IT!!!

Church was also good, Tom's sermon was Tales from the Crypt- but... I ALREADY HEARD THAT ONE BEFORE!!! I think I even have the tape- and my notes were all the same in my Bible- and so I almost went up to Tom and told him that it is too early to start re-teaching Corinthians- and that if he is going to re-teach something I want to hear Revelation again.

Did I mention that I got a new job? Did I mention that I have a new BlackBerry and a Treo 600 because that is what I do, Web Design and Mobility Support? Yeah. I still work for TI, but just doing something WAY cooler than before- I ABSOLUTELY. LOVE. MY. JOB. It Rules.

Another thing to post about...

I started lifting weights again. There is a difference between just working out and really hitting the weights. Working out for me normally consists of 30 minutes on a stairmaster or some other type of Cardio, and then 30 minutes of weight training that really would end up being about 20 minutes of weights because I would get bored or tired of waiting in line and I would just leave. Now I have a work friend and we work out at the TI Fitness Center right here in out building and it is SOOO much better to really hit the weights with someone. You can really push each other and you have someone there to spot you when you really need to bench press a massive quantity of weight. We worked out 3 days in a row last week and I was so sore that I could barely even sleep- every time I moved I woke up from the massive amounts of pain. This week I have no soreness left- PRAISE JESUS!!!

On a final note, I am helping John Lashmet put together a website. I worked really long trying to build him a CSS site but it was just taking too much effort and it wasn't looking cool. I prefer looks over functionality and so I am going back to the drawing board- literally. You will be able to check out the new site toward the end of the month- lashmet.net

To all of my many readers I hope you are well, don't forget about Daylight savings time this weekend and don't forget that my birthday is coming up December 17th- you still have plenty of time to buy me gifts!!!!

Eternal Sunshine… I would like a spotless mind.

What if you could go back and erase all the bad memories? All the pain. What if you could remove the memories that made you cringe, the embarrasing moments, the akward times? What would you erase?

If you did erase the past, what would keep you from making those same mistakes again?

There are some memories that could be erased and I don’t think that I would ever miss them. I wouldn’t miss the humiliating times I got punched in the face when I was in 5th and 7th grades. I wouldn’t miss all those times I got called Michael Jackson, Prince, and Faggot for having a high voice. I doubt that I would miss having my face zipped up in my jacket by the bully in my fourth grade class. I just now realized that if my entire school experience could be erased from about 4th through the 8th grade- I would miss very little- it sucked.

I think that it would be nice to have certain people totally erased from your life. If my real dad were erased from my memory would I even miss him? Every time I think about him I feel a small pang of hurt and loss and a smidgen of resentment and I keep thinking that I have let that go- but I haven't- my goodness, I haven't.

That memory where my girlfriend broke up with me because she found out I was part black- yeah, I could do without that memory.

But what I realize now at 28- it is those bad memories that have made me the person that I am today. Each memory has chiseled away at me, molded and shaped me, and made me a better man- yes, better- not bitter, most of the bitterness is gone- most of it.

I just finished watching Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and it was very different, but good. I always enjoy Jim Carey movies, and I like this movie because it is not your every day story- its just different- not a movie for everyone, but good. Did I say that already? The movie made me think of life and how it is so different for each of us. Each one of us has our own set of problems, needs, dreams, pains- we are all so different, but so much the same.

This is my favorite quote from the movie, but there are lots of good lines- lots of them.

How happy is the blameless Vestal's lot
The world forgetting, by the world forgot
Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind
Each prayer accepted, and each wish resigned.

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And Eternal Sunshine has the song Follow the Day by Polyphonic Spree which I really love.

STOP. HANDLING. ME.

You are probably wondering what that title means- well, let me explain.

I was watching an episode of Boston Legal a couple of weeks ago and there was this lawyer on there and she was getting talked into doing something that she didn’t’ want to do. Well, she just stops her boss and says, “Boss, you are handling me.” Which was the very thing that he wanted her to do- to someone else. “Handle” the situation. Handling really means manipulation, just a really good way of manipulation. It takes someone that normally doesn’t want to do something and then finds a way to make them do it, and like that they are doing it.

A good example of being handled is when I was helping Blake Lemons move the Sanger newspaper that his father owned. He would say, “Man, Eddie, your so strong, do you think you can just lift this one on to the truck by yourself?” and I was like, “Yeah, no problem.” After I had loaded the truck halfway, I caught on to his little game, I was only 14 at the time, but I was already over 6 foot and 200+ pounds.

Now I am 28, and I get handled every now and then because I like my ego to be stroked, it’s like alcohol, or sex, when it’s thrown in your face you are blinded by it. Mix flattery, with Alcohol and sex and that is a deadly combination and a whole nother story.

Speaking of different stories, I went to Little Rock over the weekend and I saw DW!! I love DW and Allison- It was really good to see them.

Also, something that I realized- I really, really, really miss being around good quality Christian people. Even at this conference I made some quick friends that were just really neat people. I have some Christian friends here in Plano, but they are not quite as “Christian” as I would like them to be, and trust me, my definition of Christian is pretty broad.

I also enjoyed spending a lot of time with Tom Nelson this trip. He is really funny, and he always has these great stories to tell. I like the stories, but what I like most of all is that he reminds me of my dad in some ways, he is a good man, with good moral fiber, and a big heart, and the desire to share Christ and to teach others about God. I miss that. I feel like I live two lives, the Monday through Friday Eddie, and then the weekend Eddie. I will eventually have to merge the two- and it appears that the Monday through Friday Eddie will win, but not without a few changes.

And to all my readers- I love you very much.

Friday Night Lights

You ever get the Cramps? Your stomach just starts gurgling and churning and aching and then all of the sudden you have to go to the bathroom- immediately? Well, this rarely happens to me, but when it does happen, it always seems to spoil something other than my pants. It normally cuts into my plans- like a date with Anna Kournikova- speaking of which- she was on The Apprentice the other night with John McEnroe- which was very cool.

Anyway, I had to miss the Friday night session of The Song of Solomon because I wasn’t feeling well.

Saturday morning I got up at 6:30 and went to Irving and had breakfast with Braun – sort of. We were supposed to meet at The Corner Bakery, I got there early, got a coffee and a Cinnamon Roll- nothing better than black coffee and a good Cinnamon Roll- and started reading my book. I was just about done with my coffee and roll when Braun shows up and says, “I hate standing in line, I am the most impatient person in the world, do you want to go to Starbucks?” and I was like, “Sure, whatever” and off we went.

The conference was fun, I really didn’t work this conference like I normally work most conferences, I just chilled out and said hello to a few friends and then went out to eat with the band afterward. The band minus Michael Armstrong. Speaking of Michael- he said that he will be on Oprah soon with Julie Roberts- very cool.

So after the conference we went and ate at this great restaurant called Taco Diner, it was really a Mi Cocina- even the credit card ran as Mi Cocina- and it was priced about the same and the food was just as delicious.

Saturday night I was supposed to go and eat steak with the Talburts. Mr. T was going to cook us steaks, but that didn’t work out so we ended up going out to Outback instead- which was delicious!!! And before that we went and saw Friday Night Lights- I decided to do a two word movie review of all the movies that I see. Friday Night Lights was Brutally Honest. Go see it.

Sunday I went and played my new favorite indoor sport- Racquet Ball. Cody, Dumas, and myself had the best time- we played for two hours- it rocked! It’s a great game that requires some serious hand/eye coordination- loved it. It was only my second time to play, but I was actually pretty good- I mean, sure, if I was playing against someone really good- like Zach Pope, then yeah, I would probably sumo suck, but I wasn’t, we were just having fun, and it rocked.

Other than that there is nothing new in my life- I gotta run home and do some Yoga- I am really tight after the racquet ball- especially my calves and my right forearm.

Love you.

A Man of Many Friends May Come to Ruin... Proverbs 18:24

I moved to Plano last Christmas, literally, I packed my stuff on Christmas Eve. It was the best decision of my life. Too many times I have let friends and relationships hold me back from where I am going. Life is like that, I don't like it, I didn't set up the rules.

I have lots of friends, and since the move I have had to be more selective with the people that I spend my time with. I never intend to hurt people, but I realize that sometimes letting people go is painful.

I read a book by T.D. Jakes that was called, "Loose that Man and Let Him GO!" Jakes talked about this phenomenon, of how some people can't seem to let go of people in their lives, how we feel obligated to keep relationships despite the fact that they are holding us back. Why? A lot of times it is because of our own insecurities, sometimes we do it because we think we are helping the other people involved in the relationship, the reason's are many, but the reality is the same- Let. Them. Go.

I used to get upset when people moved on. I felt like they were abondoning me, but that is not true, they were just living their lives for themselves, doing what was best for them- and that is what I am trying to do. I hope that my friends that have suddenly stopped calling and stopped returning my phone calls realize that I wasn't trying to avoid them, I apologize for not being able to return your call immediately, but sometimes I just didn't know what to say. How do you tell someone, "I love you, but I don't want to be best friends anymore?" "I love you, but we've grown apart, our lives are heading in a different direction, we don't click, this friendship is one sided, you are too needy, you are sucking me dry, you are wearing me out!" How do you say that? If you know of a good way, then please, please- tell me.

My biggest problem is that I am like Will Ferrell when he plays that bad guy in Austin Powers- the Spy who Shagged Me. When Austin asked him anything three times, then he would finally tell them the answer. If you ask me three times to do something, then invariably I am going to say yes no matter how it affects me. Perhaps to you going out to dinner seems like no big deal, it's only 10 bucks, but maybe I said yes EVERY SINGLE DAY for the last year and now I don't have the money to pay my bills. Perhaps to you it seems like I only come and visit once a month, but in reality, I have only spent 5 saturday nights at my apartment in the 9 months that I have lived there.

I know many of you may be reading this post and thinking, "Is he for REAL?" the answer is "YES!" People don't like taking no for an answer, so I just stop calling you back because I know that you will want something and I won't be able to say no because I want to make you happy because making you happy makes me happy- but then later I am miserable.

So, to the people that I do spend a lot of time with, those of the friends that stick closer than brothers, Joe, Jimmy, Cody and his family, Braun, Dumas, Alan, my parents, my sisters... those are the people that have been there for me time and time again, people that understand me, and love me, people that I find never wear me out, or if they do, they are worth it. For them I will go the extra mile, I love them, we are inseperable. Thanks for being there when I needed you.

To all my other friends, I love you, just don't set your expectations real high when it comes to our friendship- I am really not worth the hassle.

Also- I am working on another, much better, CSS based design that will literally, KNOCK YOUR SOCKS OFF- just kidding- it won't be that good.

But, if you are looking for the photo websites then they are located at:

www.postednote.com/wedding.htm
www.postednote.com/waco.htm
www.postednote.com/eddosroom.htm

It's all about the napping

I played paintball on Saturday for Cribby's birthday. It was a blast. Then Saturday night I went to see Shaun of the Dead with a friend. It was hilariously disgusting.

I was really, really tired when I went to bed Saturday night and I slept about 10 hours. Sunday, I woke, went to Walmart, rented a movie, Laws of Attraction (Pretty Good), then I turned on the football game. I don't remember who was playing, I just remember waking up 3 hours later- awaking and thinking- I should never wake up- just let me sleep here FOREVER.

And by this time I am on the floor, not on the couch anymore, and I have slobbered on my couch pillow- Yuck- and my body feels like a very heavy tree that has just been chopped down by someone with a dull axe.

So, now I am at work today and I am still tired, because last night when I finally did decide to go to bed, I wasn't tired. I was wide awake. And then the storms came, and boy did they come. Clapping and pounding me awake with their thunderous arrival. How dare you!! I screamed out, I am trying to sleep! But alas, it did no good. So, I tossed and turned, I huffed and puffed, and when I finally felt like my apartment was about to be blown down I got up out of bed- BEFORE the alarm clock went off. Stupid Storm. Stupid wonderful Nap.

ugh. This post is all disjointed, it's a bunch of half thoughts tossed together- I hope you can understand it enough to hear what I am saying. Naps are awesome, but later you can't sleep when you know you need to sleep, or when you are too bored to stay awake.

Love.