Song of Solomon

Yesterday I got back from Springfield, MO. The SOS conference was held at James River Assembly Church- one of the nicest contemporary churches I have ever been in. Sometimes when we go to conferences at smaller churches we don't have all the niceties and accomodations that the larger churches have. I like the smaller ones sometimes becuase they are more intimate, and the larger ones because they take such good care of us in the green room- lots of food, walkie talkies, and a host of other special treatments- this one even had someone that shined shoes.

A weekend at one of these church conferences is a blessing. I don't get paid, but I have a great time and invariably I get to see old friends. Because of the proximity of James River Assembly to Kanakuk Kamps there were a large number of Kanakukers there. It was awesome getting to see such good people. A lot of times when you work an 8-5 job you forget how wonderful it is to be surrounded by good solid christian people. People that care about you, that listen and are connected to you in a way that only Christians can be connected- like family. All like minded with the same goals and purposes- sharing the word of God and having fun while doing it.

It seems to be out of fashion these days to call a spade a spade, to tell the truth and to tell it straight, to have morals and integrity, but I don't mind being out of fashion. I love Jesus- he died on the cross for my sins and I believe in him. I have learned a lot about other religions and the one thing that I find that they all have in common is that they lack a relationship with their deity or deities. Their savior did not die on a cross for their sins, their god doesn't cause the lame to walk and the blind to see. And the sad thing about people that I try to tell about God is that they seem to think that I just became a Christian on a whim, that I have never questioned my faith, that I have never sought the truth or had any doubts about who God is- they are wrong. I have studied, I have inquired, I have tried other paths, this one works for me. I still have my share of questions, but most importantly, I am very aware of one answer- and that answer- to so many of the questions is Jesus.

I have some friends that I have gotten close to and it hurts me to see them so lost. I have tried to share the gospel with them, I have tried to make them see, but my words fall on deaf ears. It's sad actually, watching them struggle, watching them live their lives every day without the joy and security that comes from knowing Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord. I don't try to push Jesus on them or anybody, that only causes people to run. Being a Christian doesn't require much, it's not like you have to pay 200 dollars and suddenly your in some pyramid scheme that is going to tie up all your time, rather it's a free gift, no strings attached!

So today, if you don't know Jesus, if you have no faith, then I encourage you to seek the truth, give God a chance- what do you have to lose? Try it out, John 3:16 says, "For God so loved the world that whosoever believeth in him should not perish but have everlasting life". What a blessing! All you have to do is believe.

I love you all and hope to see you one day in heaven.

Rich People Wear Polo

I was watching TV last night and I noticed this lady that looked like Janet Lemmons. I used to clean the house for the Lemmons' in Sanger, Texas. To me they were extremely wealthy. They owned the Sanger Courier, their son Blake Lemmons drove a gorgeous white IROC-Z, their daughters went to TCU and RICE, their parent's drove Mercedes Benz's, and they all wore Polo.

When I was growing up we didn't have very much money and I thought anyone that could afford to wear Polo was rich. I never had Guess Jeans until I bought my own pair with my own money. (They were the bitten fly style, button ups with a small whole cut so one of the buttons showed on the crotch.)

I used to watch Blake Lemmons at the football games taking pictures for the Sanger Courier. He always wore fancy Polo shirts, he looked like Alec Baldwin, he had a cool IROC, his girlfriends were hot, and I wanted to be just like him. I was only 13 when I started cleaning the Lemmons' place, I took over for my sister when she got a different job (we all had jobs at a really young age). Then I moved into the actual Newspaper office and started labeling papers for mail delivery. I worked there for a total of 6 years off and on and to this day I know that part of who I am was shaped by that experience. And most of that experience was filled with Envy.

Although we weren't rich, we never needed anything. We had a warm house, and nice clothes and plenty to eat... but definitely no Polo.

I now realize that Polo is not as expensive as I once thought. Life isn't always about having an IROC, and the world won't end if I don't have designer label jeans. I remember growing up thinking that if I just had the right shoes, the right shirt, the right car that everything would fall into place- I would meet the right girl, have the right kids, find the right job, have all the right friends. Fortunately, that is the good thing about growing up, you grow out of all that- for the most part.

Rich people do wear Polo, but what you wear doesn't make you rich. And money doesn't buy happiness, it only rents it for a little while.

A little Boozy Woozy if you know what I mean...

Yesterday at the gym Maksim and I worked out legs. I like a good leg workout, thank God for the nice musculature in my legs. I didn't ask for these muscles, I didn't work hard for them, some people got good looks, deep voices, and great hair- I got brilliant leg muscles.

The best workout for your quads is the Squat. Rarely do you ever see people doing Squats because they are painful. You stack a few hundred pounds on a bar and before you even begin to do the exercise your shoulders are killing you. Then you proceed to squat down, making your quads parallel to the floor, parallel if you are doing them right, and then you come back up and repeat. This exercise will make your quads bulge as if they just finished eating at an all you can eat chinese buffet. They will pop out the way your stomach pops out at Thanksgiving. They will scream out, "HEY, LOOK AT ME!" like a set of breast implants.

But my legs don't need to get any bigger...

It has been said that the leg workout is very important- mostly because when you work these large muscles your body releases something that makes all of your muscles grow. So, last night, I did some leg extensions, some leg presses, and some hamstring things that I can't remember the name of right now. Afterward I wanted to do a little cardio, even though one set of leg presses makes me breathe like I just ran a 100 meter sprint, so I got on the treadmill- AND MAN DID I FEEL DRUNK!

Every time I do legs I get a little nauseated. I get light headed from all the blood pumping through my body. My legs feel like jelly and I feel uninhibited and I start stripping on the treadmill- just kidding. But really, I do feel all Boozy Woozy after a good leg workout.

Wednesday is our day off from working out so I am going over to Girja's house to finish painting her living room.

Girja is one of my best work friends, here is a picture of her and her husband all fixed up in Bombay. Girja's sister is extremely gifted creatively, she made Girja's skirt shown in this picture.



Girja and Manish

This Just In!

Okay, I just hacked John Lashmet's website www.lashmet.net because he hadn't posted anything new and no pictures of his child... I also changed his template to look like mine... but with a slightly different masthead. And it appears that his newborn baby has decided to start blogging... clever little Jackson.

Central Market Love

Last night after working out, Maksim and I ventured over to Central Market. If you don't know what Central Market is, then let me elaborate. Central Market is a mecca for foodies, and a foodies is a person that likes to cook and eat food. CM is not large, but it has everything you could possibly want in a grocery store. Their produce is abundant and they have every variety imaginable, from asparagus to zuchinni, portabello to porcinni- they have it. Not only do they have it, but it is going to be big and fresh and plump and juicy. It will appear that they were retrieved from God's personal garden. I purchased already peeled garlic cloves, zuchinni, avacado, and pistachios from the produce section.

Getting to the Meat of things...

Once you move through the produce section, you will find yourself in the meat department. Two large 40 feet long stainless steel refrigerators house beef and chicken on your left and fish on your right. So many varieties of fish, so many cuts, it's amazing. I chose some Ginger Peach Glazed Salmon, 2lbs. of Tilapia, and from the beef section, a spinach, cheese and pine nut stuffed sirloin. I mean really, where else can you get a piece of meat that is stuffed and rolled with those ingredients?

Next Stop, Bread and Cheese

Currently my diet doesn't allow fresh baked bread and my wallet doesn't allow of exotic cheese so I had to by pass both of these tempting temptations. There are at least 500 different kinds of cheese in this store, and probably 30 fresh baked breads. I could have made some serious grilled cheeses if I had been so inclined.

The Central Market Deli

Central Market's deli is not like other Deli's. The Deli case is a large square and the employees are trapped in the middle like cows. They will allow you to sample anything in the case, but the sample portions are miniscule. the first time I asked to try a cucumber bowtie pasta salad in a dill dressing I was given one bowtie, no cucumber. I was a bit perturbed when they were so miserly, but I realized that they probably give samples out all the time and they are probably told by management to skimp so that they don't lose money giving out generous samples. Last night I asked to sample the tuna and then once I decided to buy half a pound I asked if I could sample the Apricot Almond Chicken Salad, the sample portion was much larger- I think it was because I had bought some of the Tuna that she felt that I wasn't just there to graze, therefore, she gave me a larger sampling.

CM also has normal grocery store products, but the varieties are not as vast as their food selection. They have all kinds of imported cookies, and snacks, salsa's and teas. Their wine selection is astouding, but I am not a wine connoisseur so I have no idea what is good and what isn't and how does one go about learning these things anyway?

After I got home I was starving, well starving is an overstatement, I don't have flies orbitting my head in a third world country, nor do I have 0% body fat due to malnutrition, but I was really hungry. I sliced up my zucchini and some yellow squash I already had in the fridge, tossed in some sliced onion, some olive oil and Tony Sacheran's seasoning and in minutes I had some delicious sauteed vegetables. I also slapped my Ginger Peach Salmon in an adjacent skillet and cooked it to perfection. I am trying to cut back on carbs or I would have made some yellow saffron rice to complete the meal, instead I doubled up on the serving of vegetables. The Salmon was OUT OF THIS WORLD!!! I couldn't believe the quality. I have bought Salmon before from Albertson's and paid almost the same price, then when I cooked it, it was so fishy that I didn't even want to eat it. This salmon was better than Pappadeaux's!

Needless to say, Central Market is always a fun experience, and the food quality is remarkable. February 1st I am going there with my sister and her husband for a knife skills cooking class- don't that sound fun!

Gotta run!

Meet The Parents

My mom and dad are amazing- words don't do them justice. They aren't perfect, but they are pretty darn close. Dad is 70 and mom will be 50 on February 5th. They married at 23 and 43 and are still crazy about each other.


Chuck and Dana Renz (My Ma and Pa)

I just spent the last three days with my mom and dad because my mom was having back surgery on Thursday morning. I hated to miss work, I hated being away from my computer and my blog friends, but I loved staying with my mom and making sure she was okay.

My dad was amazing during the whole ordeal- he waited on my m0m - hand and foot- literally. He cooked and he went got take out food and he cleaned- HE CLEANED!!! Wow! My dad is a lot of things and he is super busy but he normally doesn't do all the cooking and cleaning and he did such an amazing job- he turns into this super dad maid husband person- he was great.

Mom was great too. I stayed the night at the hospital with her and that was different. I bet I haven't slept in the same room with my mom since I was a little boy. I slept on this fold out chair that they had in the room and it was like having a slumber party- except their wasn't any caramel popcorn and movies, and we didn't stay up late. The nurses came in all night long to check blood pressure and "vitals". I could tell an hour after the surgery that mom was doing a lot better and I only remember her having to hit the morphine drip about 5 times the entire 24 hours that she had to stay in recovery.

A bright side of surgery and back injuries is that it makes you realize that you are breakable- (my mom sometimes thinks she is wonder woman- and most of the time she is!). I also got to see my sisters, both of them in the same day! I got to eat lunch with my sister Precious and a friend of the family, Ginger, who is like another sister. It was great. January has been rough, but it has been good. I can't say that it woke me up and made me realize how important family is, because I already realized that- but it did allow me to spend some extra time with my family that I normally wouldn't have had the opportunity to spend.

I wanted to send a huge THANK YOU out to all my friends and family that prayed and encouraged. The world is a great place when you have great friends and family to support you. You feel warm and loved and sometimes the pain that we suffer causes us to stop and reach out when we would otherwise just sit back, staying in front of our computers at work, typing out inane babble on a website for the world to read.

I love you all.

New Designs

I like Design. I wish that all day I could just sit around and get paid to do web design. Currently I get to do web updating at work, I tell people it is web design, but we really don't get to be all that creative.

http://www.americanpridekaraoke.com/apknew.htm

http://www.americanpridekaraoke.com/new2.htm

I created these 2 really quickly for my sister's web site. She has a karaoke business that is doing really well- surprisingly.

I need Adobe Illustrator and perhaps Macromedia Fireworks to do better graphics editing. I am still a novice when it comes to ths type of stuff, but I am learning and it is fun.

Well, I gotta run.

Much Love.

Jackson Cole Lashmet

John and Allison Lashmet had a baby a few days ago (January 12, 2005), and since John hasn't updated his website then I guess I will have to do the honors of posting this baby online.


Jackson Cole Lashmet

He sure is a cutie, must have taken after his momma. The strange thing is that Steve Hildebrand's named his baby the same name- and their babies were born just one day apart. Steve and John were both leaders with me at Denton Bible Church. Both of them also went to Kanakuk Kamp with me the summer that I went. So, I say all this to make it clear that we go WAY back.

For those of you who know John you already know that his nickname is Lunchmeat. He and Allison said that they were going to refer to the new addition as "The Lunchable". Speaking of lunchables I am so hungry right now.

I have no pictures of Steve's baby, but if someone has Steve's email address that would rock. Then I could get some pictures of his baby and post them on my website too. Everyone loves new baby pictures.

Congratulations John and Allison- I hope it's a wonderful ride!

I hate to admit it but...

While I was on my ski trip in Crested Butte we went to Colorado Springs to see my cousin Kidd at the Olympic Center. Well, we were walking around and looking at all the buildings and I had to go to the bathroom. We went inside this building that had a big Gymnasium inside of it and I found the bathroom's. Just as I was about to walk in my friend Gregg said, "That's the women's!" If you don't know how guys are then you don't know that we are constantly playing little tricks on each other- I didn't even pause, I just assumed Gregg was pulling my chain.

After walking all the way in to this VERY large bathroom with showers and everything, I started to notice that there were no urinals. So, I quickly hopped into one of the stalls and used the bathrooom because it was empty and I figured Oh well... As I was leaving I noticed that there was someone in the stall about 20 stalls down from me- it was my cousin Tony's girlfriend- I could tell by the shoes!! No one told her I was in there!!!! I was so embarrassed- what if someone else had come in? What if someone had walked out of the shower sans clothing, in the buff!

Life as a DVD

Pause

This past week has been hard, my life has been on pause, a suspended state of being where I cannot move forward or back. With the passing of Cody's dad we all realized the fragility of life. No one likes to think about mortality, but we all know eventually we will die. The good news is that for Christians there is joy knowing that we are going to spend eternity in Heaven. Part of us yearns to have Steve back, but the other part rejoices that he is in Heaven where we all hope to be someday.

Rewind

My mother hurt her back two weeks ago. She can hardly walk. I went out to visit her on Friday and then again on Saturday and then one more time on Sunday. I love my mom, and I hate to see her in pain. I want to "will" her back to health. I want somehow to just be able to make things better. I can't. If I could turn back the hands of time and somehow change the series of events that led up to her hurting her back I would. If I could tell her not to lift heavy objects or try to move a really large bed all by herself, then I would. But I can't time travel and even if I could my mom probably would still have tried to move that bed by herself no matter how many times I tried to tell her not to. She is very independent like that, and when she sets her mind to do something, only God can stop her- and maybe this time He did.

Fast Forward

Looking ahead I realize the need to start taking better care of myself. I had already started down this road last year in October when I started working out again. But now I have even more determination to take care of myself. I won't life heavy objects using my back, I am going to continue watching what I eat, and I am going to try to get one of those physical's that older people get- Cholesterol check, heart check, the whole shibang- (maybe I'll pass on that whole prostate exam though)

Play

Life is never really paused. It is always on Play. Sometimes the story changes dramatically. There may be a plot twist, or a cliff hanger, or a tragedy but the story never ends- not even when we die. Steve's story will continue through the lives of his children. And he has a Stadium seat view like no other.

Will Mindi and Shaun have kids soon? Will Nita get a new dog? Will Cody become a rockstar? Will Travis write a philisophical book that will change the way the world views religion?

To be continued...

We love you Steve!

I debated about whether or not I should post anything about this because it is so personal.

In the wee hours of Wednesday morning Cody's dad Steve Miller passed away. (Read the Denton Record Chronicle Article Here.)

Obviously the first thing you feel is denial. It just doesn't seem possible the someone that you love can be taken away. And then when the reality of what has happened sets in it is almost unbearable. It hurt so much to watch Nita, Cody, Travis and Mindi (Steve's Wife and Children) be ravaged by the loss of their father.

Many fathers aren't close to their children, especially as the children grow older- not so with the Miller's. If anything, Steve's children grew closer to him every year. With each accomplishment, with each obstacle, with each milestone- Steve was by his children's side cheering them on, praising them, encouraging them and loving them. I was often times in awe of what a good father he was, his family meant the world to him. He always put them first.

Myriads of people have flooded into the Miller home to express their condolences. Prayers have been prayed, buckets of tears have been shed, but there are still moments of joy. Each time a happy story is retold or a sweet memory is shared there are tears, but they are bittersweet tears.

It has been such a blessing to know that Steve has left behind so many happy memories, he was cherished by every one that knew him, and he will always be in our hearts.

I forgot to mention that the Service will be at Denton Bible Church at 2:00pm on Saturday.

Unhappy Thoughts

I used to have too much time on my hands and I had an unhappy thoughts and a happy thoughts blog.

Here is the unhappy one. It was so easy to come up with these and much harder to come up with the happy ones...

http://www.postednote.com/unhappy.htm

I must have a routine!

Since I got back from vacation I have not been able to get things done around my house. I have been painting a friends house, going places, working out, and sometimes just being lazy.

The thing of it is, I prefer my life with just a little bit less to do - that way I can stick to my routine. Get up, go to work, workout, come home and watch tv.

Monday through Friday this is what I do and it works for me people. I eat better, I sleep better, the house stays clean, and I am happy.

BUT, I rarely have a week that goes by where this wonderful routine isn't interrupted. Sometimes the circustances just can't be helped, sometimes there are going to be interruptions, but why do they have to come with such intensity lately?

When I get out of my routine I invariable fail miserably at many things. Two of them being diet and exercise. Today on the way to my Dreamweaver class that I am taking in Addison I couldn't find anywhere to stop and get something healthy to eat. Finally I was just hoping to find a McDonalds so that I could at least eat something with a modicum of protein- I finally found a donut shop.

Then, once inside the donut shop I realized that I had no cash and I would need to use a credit card and I hate charging less than 5 dollars on a credit card- especially at a place like an independently owned donut shop. So what do I do? I buy 4 pigs-in-a-blanket, 2 donuts, a milk and a bottle of water. Then the nice lady throws in an extra free donut- which I didn't eat, but I ate everything else- I scarfed down evey delicious bite.

Had I went to work this morning I would have had just some eggs and a large unsweetened iced tea from our work cafeteria. It's really good and its cheap and the eggs are scrambled with cheese, tomatoes, onions, and a little bell pepper- so I get protein and a small amount of veggies.

But let me tell you this, those Donuts and Piggies were worth every calorie!!! Man they were good, hot and fresh out of the oven- Don't even get me started!!

Monday things should be back to normal. I have never looked so forward to a Monday.

This only happens when you are on a diet...

Today I am starving- I already had 3 yes, lets count them- THREE!!!! And I am hungry again.

Make it stop!

Mixed Reviews

I titled this Mixed Reviews not because I have mixed feelings about the movies I am about to review, but because I am mixed racially and I like to point that out whenever possible. Also, these movies aren't brand spanking new and you have probably already seen them, but this is just what I thought of them...

Meet the Fockers

The first one didn't sit well with me- I thought it was hilarious, but a couple of times I thought it went a little too far and I felt a little sad for Ben Stiller - the poor guy couldn't catch a break. In this second installment I thought the acting was better, the story line was less predictable, and it definitely generated more laughs. A friend of mine commented that it had a lot of sexual references, but since Stillers mom played by Barbara Streisand was indeed a sex therapist then you had to expect that. And, the sex that was being had was by two married adults- something that is often lacking in movies- (sex between married people as opposed to just free for all sex.)

I give it 4 out of 5 possible stars.

Oceans Twelve

I remember renting the first Oceans Eleven- the original with Sammy Davis Jr. and Frank Sinatra and thinking, "When is this movie going to get good?" It was horribly boring and so when I did see the remake with Clooney and Pitt I really enjoyed it. It was so much better.

In the sequel Ocean's Twelve- I thought a couple of times that I was going to be as bored as I was in the first one. So much happens in the movie that you don't see that it becomes one big "Fill-in-the-Blank" sketch, like some sort of quirkly mad lib. Then later they try to fill you in on what happened an hour earlier and by that point you don't even care, you just want to end the madness. It's not that the movie isn't entertaining, its just that its like an all-you-can-eat buffet- you gorge yourself on so much that when you leave you are more miserable than you are satisfied.

I give it 2.5 out of 5 possible stars.

I also wanted to see Phantom of the Opera. I poked my head in before Ocean's Twelve started and I watched about 10 minutes of it. I don't really know what was going on, but it looked like the movie was a snore fest- and I had hoped that it was going to be good. I plan to rent it eventually, that way if I do fall asleep it will be in the confines of my casa.

Mucho Amor

Two Horns and a Tail

Eddo emerged from his old blue Chevy like a giant sidewinder slipping from a dusty crevice. Tired, he snaked up to his apartment door rather quickly because he had to go to the bathroom. A spicy lunch had him feeling rather queasy and one of his greatest fears was public humliation caused by explosive diarrhea.

Just when he had found peace in his inner sanctum, a.ka. the bathroom he heard a second knocking, this one was not coming from his insides, but the outside door of his apartment.

"Knock, Knock, Knock"

There was just no time to answer the door. His digestive system lacked the capacity for mercy, did not care who was at the door, it only cared for itself, it's needs must be met- it would not, could not be put on hold.

Whoever was at the door would just have to wait, but the knocking would not cease. Like Poe's Raven knocking at his Chamber door, only this and nothing more...

Angrily, he stormed to the front door only to find that the knocker was gone! There was no Raven, there was no person! UGH!!! That meant only one thing- the knocker most likely would return.

Eddo marched back to his room and began to change clothes thankful for a few minutes of time to just settle. He desired to go to the gym so he went to the computer to make a CD mix of workout music. While the CD was burning, he heard a LOUD FREAKING POUNDING on the door. A few curse words slipped from Eddo's lips.

Apparently someone must be dying, if not, they're about to be...

Racing to the door Eddo swung it open wide with worry, frustration, anger, and a host of other unexplainable emotions. Before him stood Rosemary, his neighbor from across the portico, saying, "Well, it's about time you answered your door!". Tick, Tock, Tick Tock, and then time stopped.

It was odd how it happened all at once. The temperature increased by at least 80 degrees, the smell of sulphur permeated the air, and loud shrieks could be heard as if the bowels of hell had been opened.

Eddo's eyes grew wide, his face contorted with rage, he grabbed his head with both hands twisting wildly back and forth. From a distance it might have appeared that he was doing a new version of the "The Twist", but at closer inspection it would be obvious that this wasn't a dance inspired by Chubby Checker's hit song- rather it was inspired by the pain that was caused from this new transformation. Red leathery skin replaced the brown, large pointy horns sprouted out from his head, wickedly sharp teeth grew forth from a reptilian face, and large dragon-like claws completed the metamorphosis.

Rosemary gaped, mouth frozen wide with shock and fear. In one giant swoop Eddo picked her up and devoured her without a second thought. In a couple of quick crunches Rosemary was gone. Her sizable bulk had been erased with nothing more than a couple of firm chomps. The deed was done, the neighbor was gone, and the world was suddenly a better place.

Eddo looked around to see if anyone had noticed what had just happened. The coast appeared to be clear. He turned and sidled over to his green club chair and slumped knowing that it would take time to return to his normal self. Eventually people would coming around looking for Rosemary, but for the time being, no one would be knocking on his door.

The moral of the story is, Eddo needs his space, and when he doesn't get it, he turns into a Demon- a demon that does not care about you, or the fact that you keep pounding on the door desiring nothing more than Sunday coupons. It is best to keep your distance... or at least to knock politely if you need something, there is never a need to pound.

Plano Man Finally Decides to Clean Kitchen

After weeks of procrastination and just all around laziness, West Plano Resident Eddie Renz, finally decided to clean his kitchen. Friends and family had wondered why they weren't being invited over to Eddie's house and even neighbors began to suspect something was awry when they noticed a sign on the door that said, "Keep Out- Toxic Waste".

Rosemary Westchesterfield, a neighbor that lives across the portico from Eddie at the Amli apartment complex said, "Well, normally he leaves his door open and is real friendly, but lately he seems closed off and depressed, when I said Merry Christmas he replied, Go to Hell! It just wasn't like him".

According to close sources, Mr. Renz finally decided to clean his kitchen when he saw a large cockroach drinking a beer while dining on a plate of left over spaghetti.

Dana Renz, mother of Eddie Renz stated, "Eddie is normally a very clean person, for him to let his kitchen get this dirty he must be going through on of his 'Phases'."

News of the clean kitchen spread when a maintenance man repaired Mr. Renz's garbage disposal. Mario, a long time maintenance worker at the apartment complex stated, "When I went in to repair the disposal the kitchen was immaculate, so clean you could eat off the floor and so I did."

Area residents, friends and family say they still have not been invited back to Eddie's house, but that it is a good thing because they are all tired after the holidays and they are sure Eddie is too.

A new sign has been placed on Eddie's front door that seems to have been brought on by his latest New Years Resolution- it reads, "DON'T FEED THE EDDO".

"Success is not spelled EXCUSE"

At 29 years of age I think that I have this whole "life" thing down to a science, but my knowledge of this life didn't come easily. No. I used to struggle with small bouts of depression, extreme anxiety, and a host of other emotional problems that I think I hid fairly well. Most of you that read my website know me and probably didn't realize that I only recently overcame most of my personal drama- Thank GOD!

Everyone has their own demons. Everyone. Even beautiful rich people. Which brings me to my point today. I was going through some old school papers and I ran across the actual letter I got from one of my teachers while I was attending TWU (Texas Womens University- yes, they let men go there now). My statistics professor Linda Neal apparently had a few demons of her own and those demons were causing her to be a demon- to me.

My senior year of college, the last actually semester I really overloaded myself. I was taking Calculus, Stats, Biology*(with lab), and two other classes for a total of 16 hours. I was also working full time and still being a leader at Denton Bible Church. I actually think being a leader consumed more time than my college work, but I new the importance of being a good leader and a good leader I was.

Graduation was only 4 weeks away and I realized that because I was working so hard to keep up in Calculus, I had let my grades slide way down in Statistics, so I wrote my teacher a note telling her that I was really behind because I had spread myself too thin and that I had focused all my efforts on calculus and I needed some extra credit work or something to help pull my grade up. In all my years of college I always had success with this approach- teachers are normally willing to help students if they are willing to work for it- not so with Ms. Neal. Here is the letter word for word that she wrote back to me.

Eddie-
In reply to your request attached to your exam three:

When I was growing up my mother had an expression when her children go themselves into trouble: "You made your bed now you have to lie in it". What this means is that you put yourself into this situation that you are in, so you are the one who must deal with the consequences, even if it means not graduating.

You are not the first person who has taken 16 hours and worked full time. In fact there is a student who is taking more than 16 hours, working full-time, and is succeeding quite well in this class. You made the choice to take the class. I gave you a required syllabus at the beginning of class. If you felt you didn't have the time to complete the requirements of the class, then you needed to alter your schedule.

When I was working on a Ph. D (which is more time consuming than your courses), I too was working a full time job. I was also mairred and was a mother of two small children. During that time I drove over 250 miles one way to get to class (twice a week). I never asked one of my professors to consider my situation or give me a chance to make up work. Instead, I kept material I needed to learn with me at all times (the car, the kitchen, on the ironing board). Just remember, success is not spelled EXCUSE.

As a mathematics department chairman for a community college in Houston area, I counseled many evening "adult' students. You shluld never take a course unless you have at least 2 hours outside of clase to devote to class requirements for every 1 hour you spend in class. This is a basic standard (it used to be 3:1 now been changed to 2:1).

The only thing you can do is to somehow show me you know the material in this course. You have one chance left to do it, on the final. Prove to me that you know Statistics.

L. Neal

I remember reading this and thinking, "What a B!". But the truth of the matter was she was right. Yes, she could have been less cruel, she could have allowed me to make up work, she could have done a lot of things, but she didn't. And sometimes in order to get our butts in gear we need someone to kick us in the seat of the pants. To stop sugar coating what needs to be said and to just say it.

When I read this letter I still get fired up. I remember how hard I was working to graduate that semester, and the fact that she wouldn't cut me any slack burned me up. But I did graduate, I worked hard, and I got a D in the class.

This letter, and a series of other letters, notes, and in my face confrontations have helped me to realize that life isn't easy. It's hard. And most of the time people don't really care how hard it gets for you, they are too busy trying to get through it themselves. Once I realized this I stopped worrying so much about how hard my life was/is and started trying to see things from other people's perspective.

Do I still worry about being over-weight, my hair falling out, my voice being high? yes. Do I worry about the war in Iraq, children starving in third world countries, and the demoralization of society? yes. But I don't focus on the negative. I focus on the positive wonderful things about this life and I think to myself- Success really isn't spelled EXCUSE, its spelled, "BE POSITIVE". Staying positive in every situation will help you be successful no matter what.

Man, I sound like Oprah or something. Sorry I went on for so long.

Oh, and Many thanks to Nicolle for the kind words in her last comment. I love positive comments from my readers and I will be more than happy to help anyone that wants to personalize their blog template or has any other questions that have to do with HTML or blogging.

I love you!

Word Art - Of the Microsoft Kind

I know what you are thinking... what does that title mean?

Well, it means that once upon a time I created a bunch of pictures using nothing but Microsoft Word- and ONLY Microsoft Word- which is much harder than one might realize because MS Word is very limited and is vector based and sometimes places limits on you when it comes to spacing and positioning.

Dagny over at Twisted Uterus asked how I created my mastheads and I always start with MS Word or as in the case above- MS PowerPoint.

PowerPoint allows you to save files in a JPEG format so it makes it a lot easier to use than word, where word you would have to do an ALT+Print Screen to get your images into a Graphic Editor and save your file as an .gif or .jpg.

So, here are some of the items I did in Word.



Dallas Nights

Like the hit show "Dallas" it is definitely full of drama. It's inviting skyline calls out to you, "come, play, stay". My favorite in the "Word Art" series, it took me a lot of time to do this one, and I once tried to duplicate it and make it better but I just couldn't seem to improve it.




Chastened Trees

They just stood there, all of them, blank faced, staunch, rooted in their position. No one smirked, no on laughed, no one dared. Gripped by a chill that came from no where, it sidled up on them like a ghost in the darkness, cat quick. And there he was, staring back at them, Father Winter. His expression was chilling, cold, gray. Someone had to teach them the bitter truth, and he was just the man to do it.



Burn

The fire came out of nowhere. Like a hungry animal it devoured everything it came into contact with. We watched in horror. What could we do? The display, like any other form of destruction, was both horrifying and mesmerizing at the same time. Our eyes were drawn to the flames, watching them flicker, watching them dance, watching them lick at the wood of our humble cabin... the fire greedily ate up all we had worked so hard to build. When it was finished, it cared not about us or how we felt, no, it cared only for itself, and in its hunger began to look for other things to consume.



The Red Barn

What does the Cow say? Not Moo as you would expect, apparently it says, "Eat Mor Chikin!".



Reaching Trees

The moon cast an eerie glow on the mountain tops in the distance. From where I stood, the trees were black as night- and the limbs looked like large black hands reaching up to God- stretching, longing, desiring nothing more than to touch his face and and be near his glory.



The Brady Bunch Cardboard Cutout House

My first Word Art Design... a simple house that reflects a lot of what America is turning into- all function and very little design...

..........................................................................
So, if you want to create your own mastheads and you don't have a fancy photo editor, then you can just use PowerPoint or MS Word. It might not look as good as somthing done by a Graphic Artist, but there is a pride in knowing that you created it yourself.

Now with a new Masthead!

Okay, I took down the Christmas masthead and threw the one together that you see above. I am not sure how I feel about it, but I have a rule about leaving Christmas lights up past the New Year- and I feel the same way about Holiday Mastheads- you have the first week of January to remove all Holiday apparel, decorations, and lighting.

So, what are your New Year's Resolutions?

Oh, And Dagny of Twisted Uterus, I have lost your web address again, I tried www.livejournal.com/twisteduterus but that didn't work- Jes, if you have it can you repost it to my comments- you guys are the best!

Much Love and Happy New Year!

The Elevated Brownie... and other Delicious Dishes.

"When baking, follow directions. When cooking, go by your own taste."
— Laiko Bahrs

Well, this isn't as quippy as I had hoped. When baking there is no way to do a "quippy" monologue, perhaps the word ""quippy" will apply when I post a monlogue about the pros of cooking with pasta for large parties. Until then, if you have 30 minutes to kill- read on!



At high altitudes, the air density is lower than at sea level. This causes two basic problems:

1. At higher elevations, water boils at a LOWER temperature, thus requiring you to cook longer once you hit boiling (and the time it takes you to prepare your recipe). For example, the water's not as hot in Denver as it is in Texas, even boiling. This is the reason when cooking in the mountains your coffee and hot chocolate can be merely tepid, even though the water was boiling.

2. Baked goods tend to rise faster requiring a change in the proportion of ingredients used in leavened foods (such as breads and cakes). You may need to adjust the baking temperature in your oven as well.

You can pretty much just follow the directions on the box for higher altitude baking and you shouldn't have a problem. One of my favorite recipes is as follows with the altitude adjustments already made.

Rocky Mountain Brownies

8 unsweetened chocolate squares
1 1/2 cups butter
6 eggs (beaten)
3 cups sugar
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon vanilla
1 cup walnuts (chopped)
2 cups miniature marshmallows
2 8"x 8" pans

1. Melt chocolate and butter or margarine over hot water or in a microwave on Medium 4 minutes; cool.
2. Beat eggs until lemon colored.
3. Gradually add sugar, beating until thick, about 3 minutes.
4. Stir in chocolate mixture.
5. Fold in flour, vanilla and nuts.
6. Pour into 2, well greased and floured 8" square pans.
7. Arrange marshmallows over the top.
8. Bake at 350 degrees for 35-40 minutes.
9. Do not overbake.
10. These should be very moist in the center.
11. Freezes well.
12. For one pan, cut recipe in half.

For something more complex and a more adult palate you might try...

Souffle Au Chocolat

This is not a "typical" souffle in that it doesn't begin with a roux (a cooked butter-and-flour) base, but I find it more chocolatey than souffles made with a roux. Serve this with a creme anglaise (recipe below) and decorate with raspberries and apricots.

To help ensure the success of your souffle, make certain there's nary a speck of egg yolk in your whites, and beat the whites in a large, clean, absolutely grease-free, non-plastic bowl. The whites and sugar should be beaten to soft-peak stage only; do not overbeat them. And make certain the chocolate-yolk mixture is cooled to room temperature before you fold in the beaten whites; if it is at all warm, it will deflate the whites. Hot souffles such as this one must be served immediately, as the air goes out of them very quickly once they're removed from the oven. Because this is made with bittersweet chocolate, it would probably be more appreciated by adults than by children.

4 eggs, graded "large", plus 3 egg whites (from eggs graded "large")
2 tsp. instant espresso powder
2 Tbsp. warm water
5 ounces good-quality bittersweet chocolate, chopped
3 Tbsp. unsalted butter, cut into pats
Pinch salt
1/4 cup orange juice, strained so it's free of pulp (preferably fresh-squeezed), warmed slightly
1/4 tsp. cream of tartar
3/4 cup granulated sugar

For Serving:
Lightly sweetened whipped cream
Fresh raspberries, if desired

Separate the eggs first, when they are just out of the refrigerator.
Place the 4 yolks in a large bowl; place the 7 whites in a separate, perfectly-clean, non-plastic large bowl (or the large bowl of an electric mixer).

Lightly cover the bowl of egg whites; if possible, place in a spot slightly warmer than room temperature. The whites should be at room temperature or slightly above it when beaten, as they'll yield a much greater volume that way.

In a small cup, dissolve espresso powder in warm water; set aside. In small heatproof bowl, combine chopped chocolate, butter, and salt. Place over simmering water on low heat (water should not touch bottom of bowl). Stir frequently until almost melted. Remove from heat and hot water; stir until melted and smooth. Stir in dissolved espresso. Cool until slightly warm.

Whisk yolks lightly just to mix. Whisk in slightly warm chocolate mixture, then gradually whisk in warmed orange juice (if the orange juice is cold when added, it may cause the chocolate to harden too much). Set aside to cool to room temperature, whisking occasionally. Mixture will thicken as it cools.

Meanwhile, adjust rack to center of oven. Butter a 1-1/2 quart souffle dish (mine is white porcelain; use a light-colored dish for this dark souffle). Sugar the dish by placing a couple of tablespoons of sugar inside it (this sugar is in addition to that called for in the recipe), then tilting the dish until all the buttered surfaces are covered with sugar. Pour out any extra sugar. Set prepared dish aside. Have ready the cream of tartar and the 3/4 cup granulated sugar.

When the chocolate-yolk mixture has cooled to room temperature and the egg whites are at least at room temperature, you're ready to proceed. Preheat the oven to 425 degrees F.
Whisk the chocolate-yolk mixture well to loosen it.

Add cream of tartar to egg whites. With whisk beater of stand electric mixer or sturdy hand-held electric mixer, begin to beat the whites at low speed. Gradually increase speed to high. when whites are very foamy and increased in volume, begin adding sugar, about one tablespoon at a time. Continue beating until all sugar is added and meringue stands in soft peaks. Do not overbeat.
Add a large spoonful of meringue to the cooled chocolate-yolk mixture and whisk it in thoroughly to lighten. Working quickly, add the remaining meringue in three additions. Use a large rubber spatula to fold in each addition and scrape the bowl bottom and sides. Don't fold in the first two additions too thoroughly, and fold in the last addition just until no white streaks show. Quickly turn the souffle into the prepared dish (the dish will be filled to within an inch or so of the top). Spread the souffle level and place it in the preheated oven.

Close oven door; IMMEDIATELY REDUCE TEMPERATURE TO 375 DEGREES F.
Bake the souffle 40 to 42 minutes. When it is done, it will have risen a bit above the edges of the dish, and the center will barely quiver (if at all) when the dish is lightly tapped. When baked for the lesser amount of time, the very center of the souffle will remain slightly "saucy". Remove from oven.

Serve IMMEDIATELY, using a large spoon to portion out the souffle. Accompany as desired, but I prefer a rich Starbucks Christmas Blend coffee or cafe au lait- whichever you prefer.

Thin Creme Anglaise Sauce:

2 cups (480 ml) light cream or half and half
1 vanilla bean, split lengthwise (can be found specialty food stores) or 2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
1/3 cup (66 grams) granulated white sugar
5 large egg yolks
Makes about 2 cups (480 ml)

Thick Creme Anglaise Sauce:

1 cup (240 ml) light cream or half and half
1/2 vanilla bean, split lengthwise (can be found specialty food stores).
1/4 cup (50 grams) granulated white sugar
4 large egg yolks

Makes about 1 cup (240 ml).

Optional:
These ingredients are added after the sauce has been cooked.
1 tablespoons liqueur (Grand Marnier or Kirsch)
1/4 cup Raspberry Purée
2 ounces (55 grams) semi-sweet or bittersweet chocolate, melted

I am working on a new masthead to accompany the New Year and I'll have the new photos posted soon!

I'm BAAAAACK!

Holy Moses I have missed you internet!! I have missed reading about the lives of people that I have never met in person but know better than some that I have. Fortunately, I have a Treo 600 from work and so I was able to read some blogs while away- it has limited internet capabilities so I was able to read some blogs, but it does not allow for posting of comments!

Thanks to Jimmy for posting a little blurb about my absence, and for taking care of my dogs and paying my bills while I was in Colorado- Jimmy what would I do without you? Oh, wait- you are in Shanghai and I don't have dogs or bills...

As Jimmy mentioned - I am planning a quippy monologue about baking brownies at a higher altitude, I allowed him to dangle that little tidbit out there for my readers. However, he did not tell you that I was going to give a full report on how not only bake brownies at 8,000 feet, but also how to make a souffle au chocolat drizzled with creme anglaise flavored with raspberries and apricots served with hot cafe au lait- which by the way must be brewed longer at higher altitudes. Check back for this delightful post on Monday.

I have loads, nay, scads of photos to post from the beautiful place that is Crested Butte, Colorado- you should see them sometime next week.

As nice as it was to get away, I missed Texas soooo much. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE the flat ground, I love knowing that if I have a blowout in Texas and slide off the road that I am probably just going to slide into the ditch- not fall 8,000 feet to my death! Those mountain passes are hellacious, demonic, twisting, iced-0ver, bobsled-like paths that are supposed to pass as roads! HA! I was elated when driving through boring Amarillo-surrounded by nothing but flat field of nothingness- mile and mile of flat nothing.

Well, suffice it to say, I am just glad to be home, Home is where you make it, and I have made it in Texas!

Also thanks to the many people who commented on the new mast head. Unfortunately, I am not good enough in Illustrator or Photoshop to create that little graphic on the left, that is courtesy of Microsoft Clipart- One day I might be a graphic artiste, but for now my artistic abilities are limited to the kitchen and sometimes the Ultimate Frisbee field.

I missed you all so much, I love you...