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Relationships Stories

Family Matters

There I was in this room filled with women. Literally hundreds of women who seemed to be thriving on each other’s estrogen the way trees benefit from cross-pollination.

It was Blogher. It was July. It was Chicago.

I was there with a couple of great friends, one of which works for Blogher and I was amazed at all the “real” women and how they came out in droves to share thoughts and ideas about being women and blogging.  To me it was sort of a granola crowd. I mean, being from Dallas and all there is a definite need to dress=to-impress anytime you are out in public and especially if you are going to be around a group of women. But… at Blogher there were very few men around and so there was nothing to cat-fight over. The weapons, push-up bras, concealer, girdles, make-up, eye-brow waxing, manicures, scoop-necked shirts revealing ample cleavage, seemed to be stowed away and I was reminded of my days on campus at Texas Women’s University.

The setting was very similar, lots of women, very few men. This is actually a world I am comfortable in seeing how I grew up with 2 older sisters and a mother who loved to shop more than a father that liked to fish.

The conference was fun and at times ferocious. It seemed that these women were lining up for a variety of different workshops and everyone was handing out business cards like human Pez dispensers. “Hi, My name is Candy, but my blog is CandyCaneRocksYourBrain.com!, here have a business card.”

I always took the cards politely and smiled. Most of these women were older and married, none seemed to be on the prowl for anything other than a vodkatini or a strawberry margarita and some girl talk.

One of the things I noticed was the women who brought their babies with them to the conferences – even late at night. They would wear them strapped to their chests like decorations or badges of honor. The women would run on them and ask questions like, “How old is she?” or “Do you breast feed?”

I posted recently about the woes of single people and our desire to have children, but what I might not have mentioned clearly is that I “get it” when it comes to family and kids. I think all parents have this other connection with parents because they suffered through the nine months of morning sickness, swollen ankles, weight gain, sore nipples,  and mood swings. After that 9 months they had to pass another initiation where they learned what it meant to be humbled by a dirty diaper of a fresh stream of urine sprayed in their face. They laughed and cried and wondered miserably, “Will I ever be good enough?” “Will it ever get better?”

Not only do new parents feel like they are part of some special club, they actually are. They have been granted this special privilege, they have earned those badges of honor and they have every reason to hold their heads up high when others watch their children with delight. Even Jesus said, “let the children come unto me.”

So when I see my friends pull away from things of this world I truly understand why. Suddenly a dinner with friends seems like a frivolous waste of time when you could be spending that time with the most important people in the world to you. There is nothing like family. There is nothing more special than that bond you have between parents and siblings. It is a special world that you should protect and nourish and invest your time and money.

I hope one day to have a family of my own. To watch my wife grow heavy with pregnancy and to see her body change the way only motherhood can change you. I look forward to the challenges that a relationship bring. The challenges and rewards that come with being a husband and a father and I applaud those that have already made this admirable step. My only request is that you never take it for granted. One you have that family cherish it, hold on to it and don’t let your own selfish desires ever stop you from putting that family first.

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Stories

I Died

The other night I had a dream that I was sitting at a picnic table with some friends and I got shot in the back. I started to die. I became so heavy and I felt like something heavy was on top of me, like a cow or something unmoveable had fallen on top of me.

In my dream I was scared, I didn’t want to die, I felt like I had so much more to do with my life. Then I woke up.

Most of the time details in dreams fade, but sometimes they don’t, sometimes they stay with you almost as if you actually lived that moment in reality.

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Stories

Renovation Junkie

I am literally DYING to pull all of my carpet out of my house and put in hardwood floors or just live on bare cement until I can afford hardwood floors.

Every day I long to rip out my kitchen cabinets, re-purpose the laundry room and totally gut the master bath.

When I am not thinking about the inside of of my house I am fixated on my lawn, the landscape, a new deck, and a flagstone walkway and firepit.

I have big dreams and ZERO budget and so I do the small projects I can and hope for is to do some small painting projects to soothe my restoration itch.

Last week I started to paint the master bedroom after scraping the ceilings twice, painting them with primer, then doing another light texture, another coat of primer and then finally painting them with a gallon of Behr Pure Premium Paint with Primer added in. Color choice? Bleached Linen. Wall Color? Oven Straw on 3 Walls and Macchiato on an accent wall. Problems? Multiple.

When I first scraped the ceilings I thought I would leave it lightly textured by just scraping it lightly. This is still extremely time consuming and messy. Then I started to paint the freshly scraped ceiling and it looked too gritty and so I used water and a slower scraping technique to remove every ounce of plaster down to the bare sheetrock. This is easily done if you use lots of water, time and elbow grease.

I rolled on the texture after the scraping which is necessary to hide the small gouges and nail holes that I had exposed from all the scraping, but before that I applied a layer of Primer because I thought I might just prime it and paint the ceiling and call it a day, but after priming it I realized it needed to be textured.

After I finished with the ceiling I tackled three walls at once and when it came to the cut-in around the top of the ceiling – the hardest part of the job – I realized only after I was finished that I had a paint that was the wrong color. It was so very close in color, but definitely a shade darker than the oven straw that I was using. Ugh.

I also removed the ceiling fan and bought a new one and in the end this simple paint project has cost me about $500 dollars and I didn’t even get around to the Master Bath which was also on my list for this project.

During this whole ordeal I have been sleeping on the couch and it has caused my whole house to turn into a construction zone that is quite the messy nightmare. I plan to remedy this problem today with a final painting of the master bedroom and then I am going to put my bed back in there and at least get some good sleep.

Categories
Relationships Stories

And Then I Spewed Word Vomit like an Over-Pressurized Fire Hose

My friend Jimmy is in town from China and I am staying with him and his parents for a couple of days. The problem with having a close friend so far away is that when we finally get together there is soooo much to talk about. Did we cover this in an email already? Not sure, so let’s rehash it again.

Jimmy and I have lived together, worked at 2 different companies together, travelled to China together, worked as High School leaders at Denton Bible Churh and were even in Evangelism Explosion together when we were in High School. It’s been a long journey that has forged a friendship that has become more like family.

Now that I live and work alone I seem to have all sorts of information that just sort of builds up in me that I don’t have time to share through an email. Imagine going weeks and months at a time without really having a meaningful conversation with anyone. It’s easy to do because people are busy and you don’t just go sharing your doubts and fears and dreams with just anyone. So when I get around my friends that I know really care about what I have to say then I tend to just blab word vomit all over them. It comes gushing out in projectile streams that I can’t control.I apologize later and just like real vomit I feel so much better when I get things out of my system.

It’s been a good visit hanging with Jimmy while he’s in town. I think it is interesting how sometimes distance can actually grow a friendship. It makes you stop and take a moment when they are in town and you don’t ever take them for granted. I have friends that live just an hour away and I rarely spend the weekend with them and so our time isn’t focused quality time.

So if I haven’t seen you in a while and you can’t shut me up, then consider it an honor cause it means I count you as a close friend. One I could vomit on and we’d still be friends later.

Categories
Relationships Stories Technology

Sharing the Burden

A couple of weeks ago the server crashed at the nursing home where I do IT Consulting. I got a phone call while I was at the chiropractor that they had received a blue error screen and that none of them could log on to the computer. My heart sank.

A blue screen of death or BSOD in geek speak is never a good sign, but it is a VERY bad sign when that computer is your primary domain controller and without it the entire office is shut down. No internet, no logging on, no access to the database for payroll processing – nothing.

I worked 12 hours the first day trying to restore the server which was still using a 12 inch monitor circa 1995 and was housed in someone’s very busy office. Women kept streaming into the office checking on my progress, residents would poke their heads in and ask how I was doing, but I really needed them all to go away.

My college degreee is in Business Adminimistatrion but my background is in computers. I have an MCSE that I received in 1998 which is pretty much worthless now, but at the time was very valuable and it gave me the foundational understanding of computers and networking which I used to start my career in Information Technology.  An MCSE is a Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer and I paid $9000 and 6 months of my life to SMU to earn that piece of paper.

Day two at the Nursing home wasn’t much better and finally I had to call Microsoft and get them on the phone to help. The pressure was building since this was Wednesday and on Friday I had to be in Oklahoma for a wedding and payroll had to be done the very next day in order for all the staff of the Nursing Home to get paid.

I was starting to get a little panicky because I had figured out how to get part of the server back up and running, but I couldn’t get the rest fixed because I wasn’t the one to set the server up. I had no idea how it was configured and since I had been working at the nursing home my job had mostly been to fix the day-to-day activities and not to delve into the interworkings of the network.

At about 3pm one of the ladies from the home said she could call a friend who might be able to sit on the phone with Microsoft and help me out if I needed it. His name was Brian and he arrived at about 4:00 p.m. while I was in the middle of a call with Microsoft.  Brian sat next to me and I relayed to him what was happening briefly.  I had setup a remote control session with Microsoft on a partition of the server that had access to the broken portion of the server and while the guy on the phone was on the other side of the world, he was a computer genius. He literally edited the hexidecimal code in order to fix the broken server. People, if you ever get a blue screen of death on a server do not try to fix it on your own, just call Microsoft and these guys can fix it! It was amazing.

During that call I had this unbelievable sense of relief come over me long before the technician had repaired the computer. In Brian I had sensed competency and confidence. I felt like he was someone I could rely on if this problem got out of hand and it was like someone had pulled the plug on an over-inflated air mattress that was crammed into my head.

This revelation sort of floored me. I’ve been a loaner most of my life relying on myself to get things accomplished and never really felt like I had someone that I could count on in a pinch – especially in the realm of IT and Networking. Not only that, Brian and I just sort of seemed to click. We talked the same language and when the situation was resolved I felt like in different circumstances we would have become good friends.

It was in these moments of stress that I realized that this is why God created Eve. He saw that Adam needed a helper, not because Adam wasn’t competent and completely able to handle everything himself, but because sometimes it is just nice to share the burden with someone else. There is something amazing about human presence and how it affects us all.

So if you are dealing with something, don’t try to go it alone. Get help. Share that burden.